2020; a blessing not a curse

Majority of the population across the world will look back on the year that’s just happened as the year of gloom and doom, the year of chaos, the year of uncertainty, the year of cancelled plans and lost connections. I am looking back on 2020 as the year of my spiritual awakening, the year I felt the most and decided to break free. Whilst the world was turning blue midst the chaos and troubled waters, I decided to take matters into my own hands.

I started off the year healing my heart gracefully coming out of a relationship and experiencing something for the first time ever; having my heart broken. I spent the next few months picking up fragmented pieces of my heart and finding the words to give myself closure, freedom and peace of mind. The recipe for a broken heart isn’t just time, it’s connections, deep soulful conversations, belly laughs, endless crying and most importantly self-love. What I didn’t know was that moment was going to be a pivotal one, because Emily 2.0 was about to be re-born. My broken heart was the fire I needed to fuel my spiritual awakening and personal development uproar. This year was different to others, as I chose to invest in myself wholeheartedly, I learnt and applied different strategies to become better. I created more self awareness, self growth and self love. I’m so grateful that I had already decided to continue working with my life coach into the new year, as her unwavering support is what helped me to become the empowered, strong warrior woman that I am today.

In 2020, I uncovered my fire. I stopped being “too nice” and learnt how to be more assertive. I taught others that nice, doesn’t equal weak and I will never be mistaken for weak again. My kind nature is who I am and I’ve learnt to stop being sorry for that. Through many challenges, I also learnt and practiced how to put myself first more often and communicated to myself that I do matter. I stopped people pleasing and started putting in healthy boundaries with anyone I had a relationship with, all of which tested and challenged me numerous times. Something you practice the first time will never be perfect, but I never gave up. I released more of my inner Leo fire, with my heart of gold on my sleeve I stood my ground. This year also gave me the opportunity to break through and heal my generational trauma, time and time again. I spent numerous life coaching sessions going back into my timeline to heal my heart and soul and find the forgiveness needed to release all of the resentment I had towards my family, specifically my Dad and towards myself. I’ll be the first to say that forgiving yourself is never easy, we are all built to be our worst critics. In a world full of critics, learn to be your own best friend; trust me, it’s a kinder place to be when you actually like yourself.

I am tremendously proud of the way I chose to speak up and let my voice be heard this year, as every time I practiced this I did so with love, courage and confidence. A light-worker heals others, whilst also healing herself and that is how I view my spiritual awakening this year. My light-work led me to create deeper, nourishing soul connections and friendships that aligned to my heart and soul purpose. We are all connected in one way or another and when you start saying yes to yourself, the Universe will say yes right back to you and reward you in ways you never could’ve imagined. the Universe wants you to have an abundant, limitless life. We are the ones who stop ourselves, but in the new year we are breaking up with that idea that we can’t be successful. You can have it all!

I grew and became even more authentic in 2020, I became more of me and re-introduced myself to the world. I broke through fears, I tried new things, I had new experiences; good and bad, but none of them I regret because they all led me to where I am today. I learnt more, I invested in myself as a human being first and dancer second, I danced heaps and adapted to dancing at home, I started modelling and found new interests, I bought my first car all by myself, I started my own podcast with my soul sister, I dated myself, I healed my heart and when I least expected it I met my soulmate. Someone I didn’t know could have such an impact in my life, waltzed in and showed me what true love and real friendship feels like when the two combine and create a powerful, magical, divine energy that fills up an entire galaxy. I found the person I want to grow with, all whilst growing within myself. I look back on experiences, situations and people that came and left like a blizzard, and now none of that matters when the one that means the most to you is near. I look back and know that every moment led me to you and I thank the great creator above me.

My word for 2020 was alignment, and my one desire was to stay an open channel for all things that 110% align with my soul to come forward. In 2020, my promise to myself was to only say yes to opportunities, relationships, people and actions that aligned with me and who I was becoming. It served me well, and allowed me to hold space for myself when I needed it, it allowed me to create new rules and boundaries for myself, it allowed me to heal and serve, it allowed me to choose myself wholeheartedly and understand what that meant for me. One of my proudest moments was finally realising what this meant and taking back my power by blocking off the toxicity that was pulling me back. I pushed the weight off my shoulders and stood tall. I can now proudly say that I am going into a new year an empowered, soulful, loving, abundant, authentic, self-loving and strong Goddess.

In 2020, I learnt some powerful lessons, just as we all did. They have been there the entire time, you just need to ask yourself if you are ready for what the Universe has to offer you? In the new year I am ready to push myself further, to keep applying what I know and to learn even more, to have new adventures, and to serve in greater ways, to lead with my heart and create unexpected and blossoming new memories. I am ready to live my life without limits, to create a deeper relationship with my spirituality and to feed my soul with late night chats and early morning yoga stretches. There is so much to live for and so much to smile at, but for now I want to thank you for being with me every step of the way. Thank you for breathing, thank you for loving me in my ugly, when it’s hardest and when it hurt. You are a powerful creator so get ready to ignite your energy and shine your light. You are needed and I just wanted you to know that. Let’s take on this new adventure together.